Graduation and Grace

I cannot believe that today is already December 13; tomorrow we graduate from DTS. I feel like it has been such an incredible whirlwind. The past week has been great. Our team has spent a lot of time together, just getting to hang out as a ‘family’. We’ve watched Christmas movies, made cookies and coco, had a fake fire, made lots of good food, listened to Christmas music, but most importantly just enjoyed the extreme love and sense of belonging that surrounds our team now. I have come to adore every single team member as if they were my own family, and I could seriously not be more thankful for them.  I will be so very sad through this week as our family slowly goes their separate ways.

                As this time comes to a close, I have been spending a lot of time looking back and reflecting over the past several months. I feel like I have changed and grown in so so many ways. Looking back at some of my first posts, it seems so far away and almost like another person. I have learned so much about who God is, who I am in Christ, and what He has planned for my life. I have learned how to rely on His strength alone to get me through, and that it’s not about me being a ‘good Christian’. I’ve learned just how incredible and strong God is and how He always has a perfect plan in everything, even when we don’t see it. I’ve learned to be desperate for Him and passionate about sharing Him. I could go on and on for pages as to what I have learned. I have seen so many incredible things and I have also learned so much about who I am as a person and individual.

                Earlier this week I realized something though as I looked back over all my previous posts, all the things I had learned and grown in. I was expecting myself to just be ‘good to go’ now. I mean, taking the time to think about it, it doesn’t make sense at all. But in my head, I had unconsciously felt like, “ok, I’ve dealt with all of this stuff now, I’m not going to have to deal with it again.” I also was giving myself absolutely no room to make mistakes in my walk as a Christ follower ever again. But the truth is, that’s sooo not reality! It doesn’t matter that I’ve been in this amazing school for the past 5 months. That doesn’t make me perfect. I am still very very much human. I am still going to mess up many times. I am sure I will hurt people, hurt God and hurt myself before my life is over. But that’s the great thing isn’t it? I mean, it means I so often get to be reminded of God’s incredible grace. I know I’m going to mess up, and while I HATE the idea of it, I also don’t need to dwell on my mistakes. I need to realize they are going to happen, be willing to acknowledge when I have made a mistake, be ready to apologize and ask for God’s forgiveness and turn from my wrong actions and realign my life with His will, but most importantly, keep my focus on Him and bringing Him glory with my life the whole time. Jesus Christ is so amazing.

                I pray that as you prepare for this Christmas you remember Christ and not only His birth, but also His life and the reason of His birth. I wish you all a very Merry Christmas filled with lots of love!! Look forward to seeing some of you in 6 months!